What NOT to Wear: Las Vegas

So, clearly, I've been shirking my blogging duties...but, but, but...I have a good excuse! Ya see, I was all set to write a Sunday Styles post on, well, Sunday.

BUT here's the thing.
Vegas happened.

Yep, I was all ready to write a post about what I wore in Vegas for Charles' birthday celebration weekend (which included TWO wardrobe changes in less than 12 hours), but things like romance, the sweet room upgrade our super-helpful concierge (GWEN at the Tropicana!!! We love you!) gave us (THERE WAS A HOT TUB IN THE BEDROOM AND I TOTALLY JUMPED RIGHT IN THE MINUTE WE GOT SETTLED), eating too much (OMG, Sage was delicious), getting tired too early, and putting all my energies into going to see Nervo that evening at Hakkasan (who were tremendous, by the way, and incredibly accommodating by letting us stay in the DJ booth area with them - thank you, Charles & our friend Justin, for that very much needed perk) kinda put the kibosh on that. (Holy parentheses.) I didn't even pull my laptop out once. Also, complete sidenote, I have the biggest girl crushes on those Nervo girls! Like, HUGE, people.

Ok, anyway, yes...the post didn't happen as you can see from a very clear lack, posting.

But I did learn a very important lesson while I was in Vegas and that is what one shouldn't wear to the club.

Let me explain...

It all started off innocently enough. I thought, "well, if I'm going to Vegas, let's do everything Vegas-style!" This included getting a gold manicure (which actually isn't as blingy as one would think - see exhibit A.)

Exhibit A
And I had recently acquired two dresses. Both were comfortable (hey, a girl's gotta eat) and even roomy and forgiving enough for a good ol' dance party. So, things were lookin' up...but then I made a big mistake.

(see Exhibit B)

Exhibit B
I'm talking dainty stilettos with crazy height. (Likely in the 4.5 to 5 inch range.) Ya see, in the past, I've generally worn platform heels to give my feet a break. They're much more comfy than regular heels because the platform under the ball of your foot subtracts from the overall heel height, making things much less stressful.

But I thought I was doing myself a favor because I'm not sure if you've noticed, but generally you can't dance in platform heels. You can kinda bounce at the knee and sway. If you really wanna go for it, you can wave your arms around and twerk. This was the general dancing style I was seeing at the club. Girls in full-glitz, kinda-prommy (yes, that's not a real word) get-ups in platform heels just kinda whipping their arms around and sticking their butts out in a quick succession of poses designed to mimic actual dancing.

I gotta give 'em credit. They were going for it, people. Party favors that light up and everything. Like Prom on steroids, but with muuuuuch better music, booze in public, and $10,000 bottle service. A gymnasium decked out in paper lanterns this was not.

So, the show starts at 1am and my calves are already feeling like rocks and the balls of my feet feel like they're taking a leisurely wade through a lava pond...but then, the music! And a happy Charles dancing...and the two of us hopping around like teenagers. It was so good...but so bad for my feet.

2 hours (of jumping and dancing around) later, the show was over. Charles, more or less, carried me back to our hotel room. I'm sure everyone thought I was drunk, but I was actually just in a whole world of pain. I couldn't even make it to the room. By the time we got to the elevators, I became that person I (secretly) scoff at. I took my shoes off. I took them off and plodded into the elevator (luckily it was only us at that point) and slowly lurched to our room from there.

And at the end of the night, I was feeling so sorry for my legs, I decided to feed them a burger and fries. Yep, I sat in bed with Charles and we shared a room service meal at 4:30am.

I'm still feeling tightness in my legs and I'm certain my calf muscles have shortened half a foot because of this experience.

So, the morals of this story?
  • Give Vegas a try - it's just about planning the night out right
  • Spend time with the one you love & try something different for a change
Next time, it's flats and pants for me. I am going to LIVE . IT . UP, people. I'm going to dance till I can't stand!!! Now, back to nursing my legs and shooting scornful looks at my shoes. xo!


  1. I've been a silent follower for a while but this story definitely made me lol (literally!) Having been to Vegas, I know how much it hurts to walk EVERYWHERE and to sway back and forth in cute but painful stilettos.

    Thank you for a great read! And I love Sage! The food and service is stellar. =)

    1. Hey, Stephanie!

      Thanks for breaking the silence, girl! Always great to meet (ok, technically this is an e-meet) readers. Glad I was able to get a laugh! And as for the stilettos, kudos to you. Glad I'm not the only one willing to admit the pain.

      Oh, the things us ladies do. ;)

      ...and, also, SAGE IS SO GOOD. I can't even deal.

      Thanks again for commenting. It really means a lot! <3